Health

It seems alot of people over the last five years have had a huge struggle either succeeding or losing with their battles with their health. We just recently lost the matriarch of our hill that we live on. We call her ol' lady hass. She had the biggest heart of gold. It makes me believe that they used to make people differently back then. The older generation like me g'parents age. They seem to trust everyone without reservation until something happens to take their trust away. All of my generation starts out not trusting and you have to earn it. Seems sad that all of the great people like roys dad and mom and Mrs. Hass that are now gone wont be here to let us know to slow down every day whether they mean driving or just taking the time to smell the roses. I think the hustle and bustle of the days seem to become a blur and we get so caught up that before you know it , it has been a week or month or year and its gone we can never get it back. It makes me sad and I want to find a way to stop and enjoy my kids family and friends more I think that if we all try to do that more we will be happier healthier people

RIP Mrs Hass 2010

Finding Balance

The hardest thing that I have come up on is balance..... We need it everywhere in life. Being a mom I need balance to give to my two children. I need to cater to both of their different ages and needs. I need to cuddle my baby while also running around and discovering the world with my toddler. My son is learning new words every day and body parts and colors while my daughter is learning to crawl. I figure there actually needs to be 3 of me. I also need balance with my hubby to be. We need to realize that we both work hard but in different ways. We need to learn to communicate better. To set back when it gets heated and just cool off. Balance is a really tricky thing. I need to be a mom , wife, lover, friend, and daughter sometimes all at the same time. I feel like that old toy stretch arm strong...I only hope I stretch and not rip. I also am getting my business going I am a rep for Avon. I need to educate myself on all the product daily and rem my clients individual needs. It takes alot of my time but I really love it. I also need to spend more time with roy away from the kids just going for coffee or a walk. We need it we really enjoy each others company when we stop all the daily rush and relax. I need to do more for just me whether its a pedicure or a walk or just going to buy a cocktail. I need to not lose myself in this life but rather grow and just become me. So you see balance is a very tricky and important thing. We all need it and yet it is very very hard to accomplish.

Another day

ok, lets get down to the dirty details......I am 29 a mom of two wonderful beautiful children. My son bradley is a brave stubborn courageous two year old. My daughter is a beautiful smiley imaginative 6 month old. I am engaged to a yummy man who is the best provider for a family anyone can ask for he would work 24 hours a day if need be. I live in a heaven that is a apple orchard so I have the best of both worlds I live in santa cruz which is a gorgeous beach town and instead of living in town I live in nature and love it. I get to teach my kids things that normal parents would have to do while camping or hiking. We have alot of different animals up here from lizards to deer to hawks ect. So sounds great right? So why the hell do I struggle to get through day to day. Well I have postpartum depression. It has made me sad and unable to cope most of the time with just being happy to be a mom. Mad? Hell yes. I have a wonderful family and 60 percent of the time I can't enjoy it. I am very thankful to be surrounded by people that can see when I am struggling and step in to help. My only hope is that one day my hormones or whatever will go back to normal and I can get off the meds and just be thankful that god gave me the chance to have the beautiful family.

A day at a time....

Well lets see I havent posted in a while.....Today I am not having a really good day. More later